In fact, curiousity is the main reason why I decided to go all the way to Canada to study. I'm curious about a lot of things, but the world and living life to the fullest are on the top of my list.
They say if the life you live doesn't make your heart race, you don't live dangerous enough.
I was studying English Literature in a University in Indonesia before I left and moved to Humber. I was doing great, academically, but that wasn't enough.
I wanted more. I wanted an adventure. I wanted to see the greatness the world has. I wanted to know how strong I could be.
I wanted to be excited everytime I woke up because I know I'm going to do something thrilling, something that will make my heart race, something that I love. I didn't feel that way back home. That's when I knew I needed to get out. I needed to not only discover the world, but also to discover myself and what I wanted in this life.
I didn't say that I wasn't happy back home. I was. I had a great life. I had great friends and great family. My mom is practically a hero. She always makes sure I get everything I need. And my dad, he's awesome. He always makes sure I get everything I want. I love them and I'm very much grateful of everything they've done.
Leaving them was the hardest thing I've ever done in my life. Maybe that's why I'm always scared of airports. Not because of the place, but because of the feelings I get. I remember getting my heart shattered when I saw my whole family and friends watching me leave. My whole body hurt, I couldn't breathe. It took me awhile to calm myself down. I said to myself, there is no going back.
My first days in Canada were tough, but they were nothing compared to my first day at Humber. I could feel my heart beating out of my chest. I was terrified. My head kept on thinking what ifs.
What if I'm not good enough? What if I'm not as good as I thought I was? What if this all is a big mistake? What if no one wants to be friends with me? I'm going to die alone and no one will find me until a month later when my body has turned into corpse! Oh my God! What have I done??!!!
A year later, I realized that day was the last day I doubted myself. I realized that if I can survive by myself in a country that I've never been before, surrounded by people I don't know, there's nothing I can't do. I can proudly say that today, I'm alive. Not just physically, but every inch of my body feels alive. I get to experience and learn so many things. I feel like I've grown so much within a year.
I like writing and I'm obsessed with movies and tv shows, which is why I chose the Journalism program. I want to be able to share my experience and thoughts with the world, and hopefully have a career in that area. Humber helps me explore writing in a way that I had never thought before. As much as I like writing, I sometimes feel like I'm writing nonsense, like I'm just blabbing about everything. My program helps me focus on that. I know my writing is still far from perfect, but I'm still curious to know whether I'm good enough to be a good writer. With the unconditional help from friends and helpful teachers, I'm confident about it.
To say the least, I'm very happy with how my life turned out. Now I can go to bed with a big smile on my face, because I know I'm living a good life and I'll be learning something new every single day. :)
By: Tiara Samosir